I hope you underestimate me.
And, I hope that you are wrong.
I am no stranger to the underdog. This is not the first time that I will be underestimated. It is also, unfortunately, not the last. Rather, it is just another moment of deja vu.
I am also not alone in this. As a woman in STEM, this is a part of my professional experience. It is an unfortunate part of all of our professional experiences. Much like words written in stone, I will be written off frequently in my career. Passed over. Passed up. Described as too inexperienced, not what we’re looking for, or just not a good fit. Looked past for a less qualified coworker or peer. It just wasn’t the right time. It’s just not the plan we had in mind for you. These vague words get to define what doors do not open for me.
I do not always fit neatly into the traditional mold of what ‘engineer’ or what ‘ideal candidate’ might be. I was taught this in childhood, as I was steered away from playing with ‘boy toys’ and told to pick up a doll instead. I was taught this in school, when teachers questioned my love for math. When I told my high school guidance counselor that I wanted to be an engineer, did he encourage me? Was he delighted? No. The first word out of his mouth:
“Why?”
Did he ask the boys in my class that too?
Nevertheless, I persisted. I graduated high school at the top of my class, I got accepted into engineering school, I proved them all wrong. And yet, I was met with the same resistance in college. I wish it was an exaggeration when I say that I had professors who literally did know acknowledge the existence of the women in their classes. Who literally did not hear us speak. I’ll never forget the moment my advisor, who had taken a bet on me, told me that so many of his male colleagues refuse to work with women students. In that moment, ringing in my ears:
“Why?”
Once again, I persisted. I graduated cum laude. I was finally able to place my hands on a piece of paper that said my name next to Bachelor of Science in Engineering. I earned a master’s degree. I earned a master’s degree with a 4.0. There was something to be said about me, about what I have accomplished. I did it. My name, next to Master of Science. Still, they came for me. The…
